It may be upsetting and heartbreaking to see someone you care about remain in a bad relationship, and advising your friend to end the relationship could be tough.
Although you want to assist, you don’t want to come across as demanding or judgmental. The secret to advising a friend to end a bad, unhealthy, or toxic relationship is to be patient, empathetic, and supportive.
However, being a good friend is telling the truth and encouraging your friend to end a toxic relationship. Your role is to show your friend how this relationship harms him or her. Please read our guide on the subtle signs to identify an unhealthy relationship. Here’s how to approach it carefully.
Tips on Advising Friends To End an Abusive Relationship
1. Listen Without Interrupting
Listening is the most crucial thing you can do before giving any advice. Allow your friend to speak freely without feeling hurried or scrutinized. Sometimes, they can get the clarity they require just by being heard.
Keep your presence and silent support to yourself; don’t interrupt or voice your views too quickly.
2. Build Up Their Self-Image
Bad relationships can be detrimental to a person’s self-esteem. Tell your buddy how valuable they are.
Compliment their skills and tactfully draw attention to instances in which they have handled situations successfully. A person is more likely to make wise choices when they feel powerful on the inside.
3. Always Be There for Your Friend
It’s important to be consistent. Whether they choose to stay or go, let them know you’ll be there. Don’t leave them, even if you firmly feel that they should leave.
They may feel braver to make difficult decisions if they know they have consistent support.
4. Avoid Harsh Judgments
Conversations including “I can’t believe you’re still with them” or “You’re being stupid” may be meant with love, yet they cause more harm than good. Your friend may become defensive, feel confined, or feel humiliated as a result.
The last thing you should do is pass judgment if you genuinely want to counsel a friend to end a bad relationship.
5. Be Empathetic, Not Forceful
Consider how difficult it is to leave, particularly when time, feelings, or even safety are at stake. Try saying something like, “I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you, but you don’t deserve this pain,” rather than, “Just leave.”
It moves the emphasis from taking action to comprehending.
6. Build Your Own Support Circle
Being there for someone during a trying time can be emotionally taxing. Additionally, make sure you have individuals with whom you can communicate.
Your mental health is important, whether you get it from friends, a therapist, or support groups.
7. Check In Regularly
Avoid bringing up their relationship in every conversation. Instead, do a general check-in with them: How do they feel? How are things doing at work or school?
The more comprehensive your assistance sounds, the more likely they are to open up when the time is right.
8. Don’t Judge If They Stay
Even if you know your buddy isn’t ready, ending a toxic relationship is difficult. Don’t cut them off or guilt-trip; just keep being there for them.
When they eventually decide to go, your patience could make all the difference.
9. Indulge in Fun Stuffs Together
Assist your buddy in rediscovering the aspects of life that make them happy. Spend time together, take up a new pastime, or binge-watch a humorous program.
Shared experiences can serve as a reminder that life exists outside of the relationship, and joy can be therapeutic.
10. Learn to Let Go, But Be Honest
You might eventually need to explicitly communicate your worries. When you do, be straightforward and composed. Say something like, “I’m quite concerned about you. This relationship, in my opinion, is more detrimental than beneficial. Then let them make up their minds.
Letting go implies giving up control over your friend’s decisions but remaining there to support them, not leaving them.
11. Encourage Them to Seek Help
Encourage talking to a trustworthy adult, joining a support group, or perhaps starting treatment. Professional assistance is sometimes what is required. If they are afraid to make the initial move, offer to accompany them.
Conclusion
Your objective when advising a friend to end a bad relationship is to provide consistent support until they feel capable of making that decision on their own, not to pressure them into doing so. You can also learn why people stay in bad relationships and find it hard to call it quits.
Be the voice of common sense without adding to the strain. In their most trying times, you may be the friend they need most if you have patience, understanding, and support.
Ever given relationship advice to your friends? Share with us what worked in the comments
Image Credits: Photo by One zone Studio on Unsplash