And when I say cookie, I’m not talking about the ones you bake

I have had several of my lady friends complain about the men in their lives. What seemed obvious to me was a dead end relationship, these women were devastating themselves with, and committed to making them work. They would throw their bodies and money at these men in hopes of establishing a better relationship, only to find more disappointment. The following scenarios are prime examples of where women need to wrap their cookies up and move along.

If he says you are a “Friend with Benefits”…
It’s time to upgrade your cookie.
This only means, he likes that you let him take advantage of you and he think you’re easy.

If he doesn’t kiss you in public…
It’s time to upgrade your cookie.
A guy who likes you WILL hold your hand and all that in public, but will keep it rated PG.

If he doesn’t call, but only texts you…
It’s time to upgrade your cookie.
How do you expect him to be into you when he doesn’t even want to hear your voice? Or have the courage to actually SPEAK to you…UPGRADE.

If he only texts you after midnight even though he don’t work nights and you don’t either…
It’s time to upgrade your cookie.
A guy who is really interested in you will speak to you in the daylight. And not just during bedroom boom hours. He shouldn’t be asking you to come over only AFTER the sun has set.

If he never pays for anything when you’re out…
It’s time to upgrade your cookie.
I am not saying that you should be a gold-digger, no one likes that, BUT treat him how you want to be treated. When your dating it should be 50/50, until you’re in a relationship and you can decide on all that formal stuff. But ladies, he shouldn’t ALWAYS have to pay and neither should you.

If he only compliments you on your physical characteristics…
It’s time to upgrade your cookie.
A guy should have more of an opinion about you than what you look like. ANYONE can see your looks, expect him to have a more in-depth opinion if he is really into you.

If he says he wants a good girl but wants you to be bad…
It’s time to upgrade your cookie
This is kind of self-explanatory. If someone is asking you to act like a ‘hoe,’ it’s because that’0s what he wants. Guys ask/act on what they want.

If he says ‘I wanna be with you, but I am just not ready for a relationship’…
It’s time to upgrade your cookie.
IF HE WANTED TO DATE YOU, HE WOULD. If your looking for a BF, he aint the one. Keep it moving. There are other guys out there who are to be in a relationship.
Ladies, some suggestions: LEARN about yourself ladies, know all about your cookie, talk to your doctors. Clean up house, tidy up, Eat well, take time to relax and work out. These are all things you can do for yourself.

OVERALL, if you’re complaining about how guys treat you like crap, its time to stop allowing them to. There are sure signs he is not worth it. But once you realize them, PLEASE ACT LIKE YOU’RE WORTH IT! Stop being the ultimate cookie for every Cookie monster out there. Set higher standards for yourself. If you’re someone who thinks it’s okay to give it up, at LEAST wait until you’re in a relationship. Take some PRIDE in your cookie, no one will think it’s valuable if YOU don’t. Upgrading your cookie starts with you, I mean its 2010, I think its about time you did.
Originally posted in January 2010
Written by Ndaziona Ndafooka-Holland