Dating and falling in love seem like a universal goal for most people. At last, who wouldn’t like to find their second half with whom they can spend their life? However, some people don’t ever experience romantic attraction towards anyone. Such people are called aromantic. But please, do not mistake it with asexual. Romantic attraction refers only to feelings. Aromantic people can still feel sexual desire.
But what exactly does it mean to be aromantic? Below, you can read all about the difference between being aromatic and asexual, the aromantic spectrum, how it can affect relationships with other people, and many more. So read on and make sure you understand your feelings!
What Is Romantic Attraction?
The definition of romantic attraction is very simple: it’s a feeling that makes you want to be romantically involved with someone. Romantic attraction is often confused with sexual attraction, but the latter is a purely physical desire that doesn’t have to involve deeper feelings.
Romantic attraction is clearly different from this. It’s not necessary to have romantic feelings in order to have sexual feelings or use sex toys for men or women. On the contrary – some people have sexual feelings towards someone without being romantically attracted to them.
Romantic attraction is often confused with falling in love. However, they are not the same thing. Some may feel romantic attraction towards somebody, but not enough to fall in love with them. Falling in love refers to developing strong emotions for someone, which are usually accompanied by strong feelings of affection.
Falling in love can happen when you meet your future spouse, build a strong friendship with someone, or even when you’ve just started dating someone. Romantic attraction is very important for a happy relationship, but it’s not the only thing that matters. People can still feel attracted to each other even if they do not share romantic feelings.
Aromantic Spectrum
There are many different types of aromantic experiences. Moreover, people can be on different parts of the aromantic spectrum. This term describes the levels of romantic attraction a person can feel and the impact it has on their life.
Different types of aromantics may experience different levels of attraction. However, there is no single term that would describe everyone perfectly. There are some subgroups of aromanticism that can help us understand what we mean by aromanticism. They are:
Ace spectrum: Asexual people experience little to no sexual attraction towards others.
Gray-asexual spectrum: Gray-asexual people often experience low levels of sexual attraction, but not all the time.
Demisexual spectrum: Demisexuals have to form a close emotional connection with someone before they can feel sexual attraction towards them.
Romance-averse people are those who never feel romantic attraction towards others and usually don’t experience any form of asexual attraction either. They may experience other forms of attraction, such as platonic or sexual attraction.
Are Aromantics Sexually Attracted To Other People?
If you’re aromantic, chances are that sometimes you’ll still feel attracted to others, even when you’re not in love with them. People who don’t experience romantic attraction often feel sexual attraction to both members of the same and opposite sex (as long as they feel sexual attraction at all).
For example, asexual people may sometimes feel attracted to a member of the opposite sex because of their looks or personality traits that make them attractive to them. However, this type of attraction doesn’t necessarily have to lead to sex or intimacy in any way. Many aromantics prefer friendships over intimacy with others, especially if they know their feelings will remain unrequited.
How Does Aromanticism Affect Relationships?
We’ve already mentioned that aromantic people can feel sexual attraction, which means they can also be sexually active. But what about relationships? Can they be in romantic relationships? The short answer is – it’s different for everyone.
The majority of aromantics do not feel any romantic attraction towards anyone. They are called “aromantic asexuals” as they both experience an absence of sexual attraction and romantic attraction. They may have close friends with whom they can spend time and feel connected to, but develop no romantic feelings for them.
Some aromantics can feel romantic attraction towards some people, but not enough to fall in love with them. These are “aromantic demisexuals.” As opposed to the previous type of aromantics, these people are capable of feeling romantic attraction, but only after forming an emotional bond with someone first.
To Sum Up
Romantic attraction is a feeling that makes us want to be in a romantic relationship with someone. It’s different from sexual attraction, although the latter can lead to the former. However, it’s not necessary for someone to have romantic feelings in order to have sexual feelings, and vice versa.
It’s often hard for aromantics to explain what they feel towards others. They usually don’t develop romantic feelings towards people and may even need to get to know someone for a long time before they can feel any romantic attraction. Aromantics can be in relationships, but many prefer not to.
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